Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves

 

True confession time.  While I am a self-described geek and proud of it, I’ve never played Dungeons and Dragons and don’t really know much about this world. Sad, shameful, and tragic but true.  Nonetheless, loving fantasy, the cast the cast (especially Chris Pine, Michelle Rodriguez, and Hugh Grant), and the rave reviews of audiences and critics alike I headed to my local theater with hopes that my streak of seeing wining films would continue.

No sense in trying to sugar coat it, my hopes and winning streak were dashed quickly. 

While the visuals and the sets are good, the plot is decent, the script itself is dry, soulless, and flat. Within the first twenty minutes of this bloated 2-hour and fourteen-minute Dungeons & Dragons Honor Among Thieves had me not just bored but actively fighting to stay awake.  And hour in I had not only long since stopped caring about anything going on with this film. I did, however, decide on tacos for dinner. 

Pine and Rodriguez give it their all, but there’s just no saving this one.  A total lack of chemistry with any of the actors/characters is insurmountable, making suspension of disbelief impossible. I didn’t buy into the group’s “thanks for coming to the movies” introduction before the film let alone during the epic quest rife with life and death situations within.  No true character development as well does no one any favors. The most interesting character blows through quickly and is a wasted opportunity, while another is heavily focused on but is just tiresome and annoying.

Dungeons & Dragons Honor Among Thieves has been hyped for being fun, playful, and funny. I’ve got to disagree. There are too many jokes and few of them land.  I scoffed a few times and along with the rest of the audience had precisely one laugh-out-loud moment towards the end of the movie, though I’d be hard press now to tell you what it was.  

There was little joy watching this film.  

There’s no spark. No magic. Little world building. Hell, there’s hardly even a dragon and even on that account, I’ve seen better.  And recently.

I really wanted Dungeons & Dragons Honor Among Thieves to be entertaining and the start of a new franchise to look forward to seeing.  I tried to get into it and have fun.  I couldn’t.  I just couldn’t. Instead, Dungeons & Dragons Honor Among Thieves is nothing more than big budget eye candy that’s all sizzle and no steak, cashing in on a built-in fan base.  

First film of the five I've seen this year where I can say, not worth the effort, time, or money to see in the theaters. But if you do, because you absolutely HAVE to, yes there is a credit scene.  Thankfully it’s at the top of the credits so you don’t have to wait too long.

Mainly for the visuals Dungeons & Dragons Honor Among Thieves gets a 4 from me.